Little Empress
The human mind is designed to think systematically. We classify, we try to find patterns, reasons - so that our mind can comprehend our observations logically. This includes the way people act: we tend to find the reason behind one's personality. Thus, usually continues to judging people from their background. It may be a good thing, yet I find it annoying how people judge me from the fact that I'm an only child.
"You're quite polite as an only child"
"Well, you must be spoiled right? You're an only child!"
I was never a fan of how people label 'only child'. I have always believed that at the end of the day, the personalities of someone depends on the person itself. Not necessarily all only child are rude, or impolite. If one can't position themselves at other's shoes then you have a bigger possibility to be such a person - regardless you're an only child or not. In addition, I never felt I have a special treatment as an only child. Was I spoiled? No, I was taught to be responsible of all my actions.
However, now I have to admit that being an only child does affect me, and how my life is going to proceed. Especially upon reaching the phase of being an ‘only adult’ - it sucks. You have to bear all the responsibilities by yourself. Suddenly the world felt so big, and you are just a tiny part of it - lost in decision makings. Yet I chose to be carefree, to go with the flow and continue to curl inside my comfort zone. I had plans for the future which revolves within this comfort zone; a master degree, turning my hobbies into business, continue working with supporting and warm people from my current job.
One day, I was telling all of these plans with my friend - my master application progress, where I want my career to go. However, she looked concerned.
"Are you sure you want to apply for a master degree? What about your father?
I have no right to interfere, but I can only share to you that as only child, I have always been taught to be there for my family. That was also why I decided to go to college here, work and support my family here later on.”
Her words slapped me hard. Maybe I have been spoiled as an only child, but if other kids are spoiled with toys or other privileges, my father spoiled me with freedom. He never said no to me, he always let me chose what I want for myself. He knew that I enjoy being independent and carefree in my life. Behind all of my decisions he can only worry - how he will be if I go again for another master degree, about his job, about his sickness and aging.
It's time for me to acknowledge the truth and accept the decision I have to take. It was hard to imagine saying goodbye to my current job, to the dreams I want to pursue myself. However, I have had enough freedom, and in the way forward I can create other dreams from this path as well. Now I have to go outside of my comfort zone and do what is right.
"You're quite polite as an only child"
"Well, you must be spoiled right? You're an only child!"
I was never a fan of how people label 'only child'. I have always believed that at the end of the day, the personalities of someone depends on the person itself. Not necessarily all only child are rude, or impolite. If one can't position themselves at other's shoes then you have a bigger possibility to be such a person - regardless you're an only child or not. In addition, I never felt I have a special treatment as an only child. Was I spoiled? No, I was taught to be responsible of all my actions.
However, now I have to admit that being an only child does affect me, and how my life is going to proceed. Especially upon reaching the phase of being an ‘only adult’ - it sucks. You have to bear all the responsibilities by yourself. Suddenly the world felt so big, and you are just a tiny part of it - lost in decision makings. Yet I chose to be carefree, to go with the flow and continue to curl inside my comfort zone. I had plans for the future which revolves within this comfort zone; a master degree, turning my hobbies into business, continue working with supporting and warm people from my current job.
One day, I was telling all of these plans with my friend - my master application progress, where I want my career to go. However, she looked concerned.
"Are you sure you want to apply for a master degree? What about your father?
I have no right to interfere, but I can only share to you that as only child, I have always been taught to be there for my family. That was also why I decided to go to college here, work and support my family here later on.”
Her words slapped me hard. Maybe I have been spoiled as an only child, but if other kids are spoiled with toys or other privileges, my father spoiled me with freedom. He never said no to me, he always let me chose what I want for myself. He knew that I enjoy being independent and carefree in my life. Behind all of my decisions he can only worry - how he will be if I go again for another master degree, about his job, about his sickness and aging.
It's time for me to acknowledge the truth and accept the decision I have to take. It was hard to imagine saying goodbye to my current job, to the dreams I want to pursue myself. However, I have had enough freedom, and in the way forward I can create other dreams from this path as well. Now I have to go outside of my comfort zone and do what is right.
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